by Coach Debbie

On Saturday mornings I like to catch some extra zzz’s and take my time easing into the day.  For those of you with young babies, hang tight, these days ARE coming.  So that means my kids are awake when I finally decide to de-filth myself and shower (I normally shower at 4:15am).  You know how kids are, always your little shadow and not letting you get ready in peace.  This story is going somewhere, be patient.  I like to get ready for the day in my birthday suit (I sweat a lot).  It never fails.  One of my 5 year old twins will meander into the bathroom and stare at my “privates.”  Your kids do this too, don’t they?  They ask, “Mom, where is your penis?”  “I don’t have one.  I’m a girl.  God made us different.  Now scram!”

Several months ago, one of the twins asked how they were born.  I outsmarted them and said, “Well you were born at a hospital.”  “Yeah, but how did I get out of your belly?”  “With the help of wonderful doctors.  And you were very cute and I loved you instantly.”  Avoidance.

Having “The Talk” was something I never had to worry about because I had SONS.  That meant my husband’s responsibility, er, privilege, was to teach those boys of his all the ins and outs (pun intended) of “parts” and “reproduction” and all that icky stuff.  I am thankful that before Aaron passed away, he had already taught our older two about “Tab A” and “Slot B.”  I still remember overhearing him share the details with them; he was used to it from being a PE teacher who had to teach Sex Ed to middle schoolers.

Well, I am widowed and cannot pass the baton, so I decided to read “The Story of Me,” a fabulous book in a series entitled “God’s Design for Sex.”  All my friends raved about how it so we have all 4 books (yes, 4 books.  Don’t even get me started on books 3 and 4….yikes)(side note:  I’ll post all 4 books at the bottom of this article).  Book 1, “The Story of Me,” is for children ages 3 to 5.  My twins are almost 6, so it was time.

I scrounged up some courage and read to each one alone, preparing myself for a barrage of questions and giggles.  Most of this book is tame and talks about love and mommies and daddies.  And then it explodes, “you came out into the world through my vagina.  I pushed really hard.  God made my vagina so that it could stretch just big enough to let you out.”  I started to sweat and wanted to vomit.

But, you know what?  Most of the time they were pretty uninterested in the pastel pictures and its 40 pages.  No giggles, no questions.  Uneventful.  I’m thinking, “Didn’t you just hear me say, ‘Someday when you marry, you won’t have to be private with your wife’?!”

Guess what this means?  I’m ready.  I’m ready for BOOK TWO!  I figure the olders need a review and the youngers can have lots to share at school the next day.  It’s called “Before I Was Born” and is in the same “God’s Design for Sex” series.  Because I know you’re curious, it includes things like:  “soft breasts,” “sometimes his penis gets hard,” “husbands and wives want to be alone during sex so they can think only of each other,” and a drawing of birth.

Before you get buck-wild on me and tell me I did it all wrong, every parent is going to share it how they choose and when they choose.  I was told to say no to drugs when I was in the 5th grade. I had no idea what drugs were in 5th grade!  I was practically a baby!  Well, good thing I knew before being offered, before the temptation, before someone could steer me the wrong way.  See where I’m going?  It’s time.  Even 3 year olds can understand VERY basic, easy-to-discuss things so they can fully appreciate God and His creativity.  God loves us and wants us to be fruitful.  He created sex.  He created orgasms.  Since it’s His design and He knows best, I’m thankful to have a book that encourages the Christian angle on something so important.  So sit that child down and drop some knowledge.  You can do it!